what happened between us

We’ve endured many difficult situations together, because we had that love. That unconditional feeling, I supported you, comforted you, admired you. You gave me the same support in return, held me when I needed it, we had conversations til deep in the night. That was who we were, though.

What really happened, was life. A tough life, together. Struggles most couples don’t go through, or don’t go through together. Storms that make or break couples and their love for each other. Unfortunately for us, we’ve had more losses than successes. Unfortunately for us, life happened to us and we changed ourselves. At least I know I did. I keep questioning myself about who I am, if this is really where I wanna be and if it’s really the role I wanna play for the next 10 years together. The same goes for me being a night person trying to fit into a 9 to 5 schedule.

I go back and forth, up and down, taking everything in doubt. So many questions, that I can’t or am afraid of to answer. Afraid or maybe angry, that I might have – just might have – waisted so many years into knowing who I really am today.

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4 thoughts on “what happened between us

  1. contoveros says:

    Anger category.

    Why?
    Why are you trying to fit into an angry mode when lonliness is what cries out from your words, your posts, your Self.
    Lonely for lost time, lost chances, lost love. No, not that kind of love you get face to face through physical contact, but the love that swells up from the gut spilling into the heart and then erupting through all parts of the body until you can’t contain it any more and you share that joy with all around you, with all in the world, all in our universe.

    Nice post!

    think I’ll check it out some more after going for a swim.

    Michael J

  2. Miss Kaelah says:

    Part of the anger is that some of these things have been identified in our relationship, but we can’t get that feeling back – even though the struggle is the same. Perhaps I’m angry because I’ve tried to make it work for so long now, but I feel like I’ve ended up with annoyance over gratitude, impatience over obedience, but mostly anger over accepting the losses and pushing on…

  3. justdaphne says:

    Hard to say anything is a waste if it brings you to where you are, good or bad, since each life experience brings us to the next place.

  4. Miss Kaelah says:

    True, that’s the only comfort I get from it all. I am who I am today, due to my experiences in the past.

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